“How Carrie Won the Race”
July 30th, 2008

“While you sleep”
July 28th, 2008

“Precious Bodily Fluids”
July 27th, 2008

“Rorschach Hoagie”
July 23rd, 2008

“Not even Billy Mitchell”
July 22nd, 2008

Update: Treatloaf readers have voted overwhelmingly against centipedes. No centipedes could be found for comment (not that I would have stuck around to ask for one, anyway. Those things are gross).

Next: Which flavor of medicine is best?

“Stinging Sensation”
July 21st, 2008

“Matthew 6:3”
July 20th, 2008

“If You’re Happy and You Know it, Febrile Convulse”
July 19th, 2008

“An Unexpected Cephalopod”
July 18th, 2008

“Indivisible”
July 17th, 2008

“All My G’s”
July 16th, 2008

“Sweet Nectar”
July 15th, 2008

“Don’t Touch My Clams”
July 14th, 2008

“Choose Your Own #15”
July 13th, 2008

“Arm Bears”
July 12th, 2008

Treatloaf readers are a sick and twisted bunch: the best ending for a slip-n-slide is……unsuspecting people. (Needless to say, I’ll always be sure I’m suspecting.)

Next: which insect would you least like to find on your arm?

“Grandma’s Surprise”
July 11th, 2008

“Now with real* meat”
July 10th, 2008

“Yeah, but where’s the shoe?”
July 9th, 2008

“Plus-size neckwear half off”
July 8th, 2008

“More than one way to blow a horn”
July 7th, 2008

“Contraptions for your head”
July 6th, 2008

“An easier way to lose weight”
July 5th, 2008

“More like “Regular” Night”
July 4th, 2008

“There Will Be Blood”
July 3rd, 2008

Update: the winner of the favorite word poll has been decided by a landslide. (More of a thick, craggy goopslide, actually.) Keep your eyes peeled for the treatloaf featuring the favorite.

Fresh poll: what’s at the end of a slip-and-slide of dreams?

“Alien”
July 2nd, 2008

Note to the masses: it’s a tie between “plop” and “kerplunk.” Both, as you very well know, are sounds that can be heard when dropping something. You might say they’re both “sounds of droppings.” Anyway, a tie is unacceptable. Please cast another vote….even if you’ve already cheated and voted thrice. The winner will be decided tomorrow at midnight.

“Slow, deliberate motions.”
July 1st, 2008

“Fashionably delicious”
June 30th, 2008

“Objects may be larger than you think.”
June 29th, 2008

“Where do you want it squirted?”
June 28th, 2008

“Unicorns of the sea”
June 27th, 2008

“Mixed breeding”
June 26th, 2008

“From the machines.”
June 25th, 2008

“Is she just happy to see me?”
June 24th, 2008

“How to hit the high C’s”
June 23rd, 2008

“Seeking warm friendship”
June 22nd, 2008

“Vitreous Fluidity”
June 21st, 2008

“You’ll have a great fall.”
June 20th, 2008

“You’re never alone.”
June 19th, 2008

“Horns for Hire”
June 18th, 2008

“Choose Your Own #14”
June 17th, 2008

“The Big Bang”
June 16th, 2008

“I’m not ashamed of my baskets.”
June 15th, 2008

Why is the beach such a great place to eat? Because of all the sandwiches there. Coming in at three votes (one absentee ballot), the beach takes the prize. Feel free to continue enjoying that sandwich alone in a quiet room, whoever you are.

Next: which word sounds the funniest? The winning word will be featured in an upcoming Treatloaf. (You’ll have to look for it, because I’m not telling when or where or how.)

For those of you wondering why you sometimes can’t vote, you’ll find this is no longer an issue.

“Root beer should not be served with ice.”
June 14th, 2008

“Margin of the Species”
June 13th, 2008

“Hook”
June 10th, 2008

“Just Feeling Well”
June 9th, 2008

“Grenades”
June 8th, 2008

“Flossing”
June 7th, 2008

“Denim”
June 6th, 2008

“Cantaloupes”
June 5th, 2008

Winning a grand total of two votes, the best movie goes to “Jurassic Park.”
Cast your vote for the best place to eat a sandwich.

“Ear”
June 4th, 2008

“Bradley”
June 3rd, 2008

“Dog”
June 2nd, 2008

“BBQ”
May 30th, 2008

“The British”
May 29th, 2008

“Choose Your Own #13”
May 28th, 2008

“Duck”
May 27th, 2008

“Uncomfortable”
May 26th, 2008

“SPF”
May 25th, 2008

“Summer Sale”
May 24th, 2008

“Top of the morning”
May 23rd, 2008

The masses have spoken: pine smells best.

“Mesazoic”
May 22nd, 2008

“Noodles!”
May 20th, 2008

“Lincoln”
May 19th, 2008

“256”
May 18th, 2008

“Hard”
May 17th, 2008

“Earbud”
May 16th, 2008

“Abridged”
May 15th, 2008

“Flavor of the Day”
May 13th, 2008

“Lost”
May 12th, 2008

“Inflammation”
May 11th, 2008

“The Ritual”
May 10th, 2008

“Bees”
May 9th, 2008

That’s right, folks. You can now rate every Treatloaf past, present and future. Think it’s hilarious? Five stars, baby. Scratching your head? One star mega-blast! It’s anonymous, free, high in fiber and carbon neutral! After a time, you’ll be able to look back and see which Treatloaf people think is the funniest. It’s all the excitement of voting, with no superdelegates!

“5-star Treatloaves”
May 8th, 2008

“The Satchel”
May 8th, 2008

“Dysglycemia”
May 7th, 2008

“Choose Your Own #12”
May 6th, 2008

“Tea Time”
May 5th, 2008

“Stay”
May 4th, 2008

“No Pool For You”
May 3rd, 2008

“Playhouse”
May 2nd, 2008

“Permission”
May 1st, 2008

“Flagellated”
April 30th, 2008

“Choose Your Own #11”
April 29th, 2008

“Bundle”
April 28th, 2008

“Cogito”
April 27th, 2008

If you like Treatloaf, you might like these comics as well:

The Nietzsche Family Circus

Creased Comics by Brad Neely

Garfield Minus Garfield

“If you like Treatloaf…”
April 27th, 2008

“Janice”
April 26th, 2008

“Brenden”
April 25th, 2008

“Joyce”
April 24th, 2008

“Hound Dog”
April 23rd, 2008

“Feeding Time”
April 22nd, 2008

“Red Lever”
April 21st, 2008

“Stapling”
April 20th, 2008

“Tuna”
April 16th, 2008

“Toothpaste”
April 15th, 2008

“Tights”
April 14th, 2008

“Tambourine”
April 13th, 2008

“How much longer?”
April 12th, 2008

“Name”
April 11th, 2008